Get Crafty with the Tools on Tool Academy

I watch Tool Academy on VH1 and I am not ashamed to publicly admit it. While were at it I also enjoy several shows on their craptastical mind numbing line up like Sober House, Confessions of a Teen Idol and my very favorite Rock of Love Bus. I could pull the “I’m pregnant and need to lay around and watch a lot of TV and rest card”, but I won’t. Hell I even hosted a Rock of Love finale party last year just check out all my smokin’ hot hottie friends in the picture. While we are on the subject of confessions I have seen Poison in concert twice and had “Open Up and Say..Ahh” on cassette! Now that I have cleared the air, let’s talk about last Sunday. I was snuggled in watching “my stories” and how excited was I too see the testosterone fueled boys of Tool Academy playing with hot glue, glitter, puffy paint and more. Don’t believe me? The proof is in the pictures. Oh and if you care, consider this your spoiler alert.

If you have never seen Tool Academy let me give you a very brief synopsis. These dudes and their girlfriends are all living in a house competing against each other to win cash prizes and more importantly the dudes are there to win back their girlfriends who are all on the verge of dumping their sorry butts. This week their challenge was about humility and involved a little crafting project. Just look at this stash of gem stones, doll heads and colorful pom poms they had to work with!

This guy Shawn (AKA Loud Mouth Tool), who ultimately won the competition, was the first we saw to jump in and rev up a glue gun. This guy was crafting like he knew what he was doing and I love that in a man. Maybe a glue gun is how he gets his hair to stick up like that?

Disenchanted girlfriend Aida is the meat in a crafty dude sandwich in this picture. To her left she has Tommy (AKA Slacker Tool) wielding another hot glue gun and on her right Shawn working a bottle of hot pink puffy paint.

Did the producers for Tool Academy read my blog post on making pipe cleaner tiaras because that sure appears to be what Krista is whipping up in this picture? Dead beat boyfriend Tommy has left her to briefly craft alone so that he can pep talk his muscle head buddy Rob (AKA Power Tool) about the fact that it’s ok to craft and he doesn’t want to see him getting kicked off just because of a fear of glitter.

After their outfits were properly adorned and the cookies were all wrapped with care the boys loaded up in a cargo van setting out to show the Girl Scouts how it’s really done. Ryan (AKA Naked Tool) who usually opts for a wardrobe of nothing but manties adorned himself as Captain Cookie. His partner in crime Clarence (AKA Party Tool) seemed to take a liking to the googly eyes and although he gets kicked off on this episode he does get bonus points from me for incorporating in a foam craft visor with his outfit.

The humility contest involves the boys swallowing their pride and combing Universal Studios in silly outfits selling cookies like a cigarette girl at a night club. The winner gets a princess and prince date with their girlfriends and a conjugal visit. No I’m not kidding it’s like being rewarded for good behavior in prison. The idea of a little one on one time with their ladies really gets the competition in gear and the Tools race off to out sell each other.

Just minutes before Rob was being a pouty little bitch not wanting to craft and sell cookies and right before our eyes he transforms into one of the most humble tools in the group allowing people to kick his buns of steel for money. He really does make a 180 and I was on the verge of welling up with tears of pride, but that was just my hormones. I also like this group of pseudo punkers that are doing the punching and kicking. They had their little tattoos and Misfits belt buckles on so they must be punk. Look kid if it came from Hot Topic and you are spending a bright sunny Saturday afternoon shopping at Universal Studios I hate to tell you but this punk thing is not working out for you so well.

After time is called the boys wait anxiously for the cash to get tallied and to find out who is going to quote Shawn “Get Some” – they don’t call it Tool Academy for nothing. Rob and Josh (AKA Playa Pimpin’ Tool) look on in their puffy painted outfits.

In the end Shawn the mastermind behind the men’s underwear with a condom pocket was officially selected as the winner. He was pretty smug about his victory which eventually led to some in fighting amongst the tools, but in the end all is fair in love, crafts and cookies.

Speaking of crafty TV tune into DIY Network to watch me and the Austin Craft Mafia ladies Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday on Stylelicious. Saturday we are chatting it up about belts and I have a little show and tell about resin belt buckles like the ones my mom makes on Naughty Secretary Club. You might set your TIVO for this since the episodes come on at all kinds of crazy times!

Posted January 29, 2009 & filed under Crafty, TV.